Why I'm getting married "so young"


I love this question. I think it's so funny. My favorite thing about it is the group of people who ask it. You know the ones, the older generation who complains about the younger generation that spends the entirety of their lives in their phones. Yep, it's just always made me laugh. When it's asked, my response is simple. "Why not?" It's more or less a response I guess you could say. But, it poses the better question. Why shouldn't I get married at my age? I also usually follow it up with a "How old were you when you got married?" They'll usually tell me they were 18 or so but "times were different." Or, it's the people your own age asking you very skeptically, and typically following it up with "don't you want to experience life, date people, go on adventures, find yourself?" My answer to that in the most generic sense: "No." I'd rather go on adventures with my husband, and I already know myself. (That phrase "Finding yourself" has always annoyed me, but that's a different story.) Well, here's my breakdown and my response as to why I'm getting (why I got) married so young.

1. The Foundation

Every relationship is unique. You're putting together two completely different humans with completely different upbringing and backgrounds together to form a bond. I see so much that can go wrong with relationships given all those factors. What truly makes a relationship different is it's foundation. We built our foundation on God. I'm super grateful that Carson and I grew up pretty similar with the values and morals we were taught to uphold, so for us, it was simple. I think it's very important to begin any relationship with aligning those things that are important to you. Such as convictions, morals, beliefs, etc. Lay it all out on the table. Figure it out before you dive in. I believe that with the Lord at the center of your relationship is really the key ingredient for success. Success doesn't mean butterflies and roses throughout the relationship, but it means strength and growth, and a bond that only grows mightier as we both pursue him together. (Which makes going through the dips and pot holes of life a lot easier.) So, in short, we've built our relationship on mutual understanding and respect and love of the Lord. 

2. I Found My Best Friend

Oh my gosh, I'm so cliche' aren't I? Meh, maybe but it's just true. Carson is just that. He's my best friend. Who doesn't want to hang out with their best friend forever? I know i'm not the only one. Carson and I just have a way of understanding each other, and enjoying all of the moments. The dull ones, the silent ones, the loud ones, the exciting ones, they're all significantly more meaningful when you spend them with the one person you adore and love most. Before I met Carson, I remember this moment one time I was in California on the beach. I was standing there just staring out at the horizon as the waves covered my toes. The question posed "Who are you thinking of when you stare at the ocean." in that moment of me answering my own question, I was perplexed and a little sad because I knew I didn't know him yet. But now, everytime I look at the ocean, you know who I'm thinking of.

3. My Life's Purpose

I always grew up wanting a family. And to my knowledge, I thought that's what everyone wanted. As I get a little older, I realize that's not everyone's plan, but it's always remained mine. I had an amazing example of marriage growing up and I just always knew I wanted that. I loved the relationship between my siblings and I, and I love how much support and love and encouragement  was cultivated inside our home. I want to replicate that in our life for our kids. As excited as I am for our family to grow, that's just one purpose of my life. I believe that God blesses every person with some sort of talent, or gift so that we may use it for his glory! Carson and I being married so young is so special to me because it allows us to pursue and learn about each other's gifts together and ultimately encourage each other to use them and grow in them. for the short while we've been married, I've grown more in love with him and his gifts and passions, and I get so excited at the thought of the amazing things that we're capable of doing together. So, in summary- I believe my life purpose is to find my talents, use them, grow a family to love Christ and to continue building a strong, passionate marriage. That purpose encompasses so much, and I'm so grateful I get to do it next to my husband, my best friend.

 

If you're young, and getting married, I just want to encourage you to not be discouraged by the nay-sayers (because they're everywhere) but to prove them all wrong. Love fiercely, passionately and pursue God. Because if he's at the center, you've got a sure fire recipe for a great marriage. (It won't always be easy, but it can definitely be strong.)

 

XO.

Daryn.